Pandemonium

Last night was nuts:

- Our fire sprinkler in the living room started to drip stinky, yucky goo.

- My desktop computer is right under the sprinkler. It had to be moved and covered with a tarp, rendering it useless.

- The fix-it guy came at midnight only to leave again because he hadn't brought the right equipment.

- Steam came out of my ears.



This morning is still nuts:

- Computer is still under the tarp, useless.

- Brewed coffee while making sure Dexter (the puppy I'm training for friends) didn't pull the tarp down or get tangled in it, thus hitting the precariously propped bucket that's catching all the stinky gooey drips.

- Put in wrong amount of coffee grounds.

- Coffee tasted like BLEEP.

- Had a hissy fit.

- Hubs crawled under the tarp (which is secured with clamps and also covers our dining table and chairs) and turned on the computer so I could access it remotely from my laptop.

- Went downstairs to work (we live above our store) and got a teensy bit of computer work done via laptop.

- Census guy stopped by asking questions about the condo next door. Stayed for 20 minutes yapping about his dogs and telling me jokes about pastors preaching fire and brimstone and "what's the perfect mixed breed dog for a lawyer?"

- Fix-it guy returned and has started on the sprinkler repairs. Lots of pounding and sawing and other clanking-related noise coming from upstairs.

- I've only written 500 out of my goal of 5k words this week. Which makes me feel like FAIL.

- Hubs just brought me a mocha.

- I am now 10% soothed.


How's your Friday before Memorial Day going?

ThirtyBY30 ~ Sushi

Cross another one off my ThirtyBY30 list -- I made sushi last night!

Four perfectly acceptable California rolls and a salad with sesame dressing.



Yay!

Some Thoughts on Book Trailers

So lately, I must confess, I've had a pretty negative view on book trailers. I've worked on several short internet films, acting, filming, editing, so I have experience with the genre. I see the same pitfalls over and over and often wish I could have dispensed some advice to the trailer maker. So I'll do it now, in hopes it may help someone. (Hope being the operative word.)

- Most book trailers are way too long. 

Drawing out the slides and text doesn't create suspense, it creates loss of interest. An ideal internet short needs to be 1-2 minutes. Maybe three if it's something spectacular. People who watch internet videos are ravenous - they want the info as fast as they can get it, so the pacing needs to be quick and fluid, flowing seamlessly from one idea to the next. Each idea needs to up the ante - keep surprising the viewer with each morsel, then hit them with the major hook at the end. (It's okay if your trailer is 10 minutes long at first. Every manuscript has room for trimming, right? Same goes with an internet video. Keep chopping away a few seconds here and there until you've hit the 1-2 minute sweet spot.)

- Text slides disappear before anyone's had a chance to read them.

This is an easy fix. Don't just go with the default transition time in your film editing program. Tweak each one individually. If you have just one or two words in the first slide, you may only need a few seconds, but if the next text slide has quite a few words, it will need to stay up longer than the other. Let friends and family members watch through it and note down which slides needed to stay up longer and which ones could be shortened. After working on an internet video for a few hours, it's hard to be subjective, so outside input is a must. You wouldn't put your manuscript "out there" before having a few beta readers or critique partners take a look would you?

- The same images are used over and over.

This might be okay if the trailer is super short, but 2 minutes of the same image gets old fast. Check out istockphoto.com for a treasure trove of images, most of them around a buck a piece! (No need to buy the highest resolution image b/c you're dealing with the internet here, not print. But you don't want to buy the smallest size - a small photo limits what you can do with it. More on that further down...)

- The trailer doesn't go anywhere.

It's flows like a rambling, unsure pitch. Give us the meat of the hook: set it up and then let us have it. Leave us with the stakes, the major point that's going to make us grab our keys and run to the book store right now. So what if Bella's intrigued by this new boy at school. So what if he's kinda weird. So what if she falls in love with him. That's not enough to get me to drop cash. But oh wait, he's a vampire? Holy crap, I've got to read that! How does that work? What's going to happen? Is she going to be okay? (You see what I'm getting at.)

- The image resolution is too low and pixelated.

Nothing screams novice like a pixelated image online. In this day and age, there's no excuse for it. You can't use a tiny image and expect a film editing program to blow it up and still make it look perfect. You've got to start with a large photo with good resolution. Like I said before, that doesn't mean buying the largest resolution out there. Super high res is for print. But you can't use an image that's 50x50 pixels and expect to blow it up to 1000x1000. They just can't stretch that much.

An example of a low res .jpeg image. Notice how the image isn't clear, it's fuzzy?

And here's an example of a pixelated image. Notice how it seems to be made up of thousands of tiny squares?

Both of these are a major no-nos. So, if you see pixelation, or fuzziness around the edges when using .jpegs, scrap those photos. Try to find another just like it in a higher res, or use a different one altogether. 

Trust me. 

No really, delete the photo. I don't care how much you love it or how much it fits with the story. If it's pixelated, you'll brand yourself a newbie. 

Don't do it.

I know some of this may sound cynical. I don't mean it to. I just want authors to create good book trailers. No, not good, great. Internet shorts are meant to go viral, meant to be shared, tweeted, posted on Facebook. I want to see one I can't wait to share with my Twitter followers. One that's so intriguing that I just can't help watching it several times. 

You want an example?

Here's the best one I've seen so far:

Do you have to hire actors and award-winning short film makers? No. But you can learn a lot from this trailer. Look at the setup, the mood, the narrative. Everything moves the hook forward. 

That's what you want.

Also, check out archive.org for a database of royalty free music and video clips. Also try freesound.org for sound effects. You never know, you may find something perfect for your trailer. I used both sites for sounds and video clips in this internet short I made for Ford Motor Co. about crash test safety:

Do you have a favorite book trailer? Post a link and tell us what made you love it. 

Monday's Muse ~ The Cool Factor

Check out that awesome 90's fashion!

After showing off my Ford commercial last week, I was doing pretty good with the cool factor. Supposedly I had 100 points.

Then I announced I liked Matchbox 20.

This admission dropped my coolness down to 80 like snap.

Did I stop there? Oh no. I kept going. I dipped into my cool factor reserve just so I could quote a line from Grease 2.

Lemme tell ya, it wasn't worth it.

From there I approached the weekend fresh of face with 50 cool points. Did I manage to hang on to them? Let's find out.

The hubs and I flew to Missouri Friday afternoon to pick up the "new to us" car we bought from my parents. I chose to wear flip flops because the weather's been so nice, but I didn't realize until I left the house how gnarly my toenails were.

A bit of background info: I don't paint my toenails in the winter. Living in Michigan, it's hard to maintain a household temperature toasty enough to go barefoot, so no one sees my toenails anyway. Until Friday.

I doubt anyone noticed, but dude. They're gnarly.
So, going out in public with gnarly toes:  - 10 cool points

On a similar note - which color should I paint them? You tell me because I've been indecisive lately.

This indecisiveness has seeped into other areas of my life. Primarily my quest for which book to write next. Friend Ninja says I need to start on one but my brain can't pick. I have 5 different options to choose from and all are equally intriguing. For the past month or two I've been going back and forth between them, outlining, plotting, etc. But doing this for all five books takes five times the...er...time. I keep telling myself, "You could have been done with one entire book by now!" Which is totally not true, but it's a favorite pastime to kick myself when I'm down.

Mentally bashing myself:  - 20 cool points

In other news, the rumors are true! I'm the new owner of Young Adult Books Central (yabookscentral.com), one of the leading teen book review sites on the web. Kimberly Pauley handed the reins over to me so she could concentrate on writing even more great books for teens. Her second novel, STILL SUCKS TO BE ME, just released last week! It's awesome. Go to her website to check it out.

Joining forces with YABC: + 35 cool points

We drove all the way back to Michigan yesterday, and I'm still exhausted from the trip. I'd like to nap but there's so much to do. Like painting my toenails and writing a book.

While in Missouri I got to hang with bff Jill. We sipped green apple wine, snacked on strawberries and whipped cream, watched Phineas and Ferb and iCarly, and gabbed about the Twilight stars on Oprah.

Let's break this one down:

Hangin' with Jill: + 50 cool points

Wine & strawberries:  + 5 cool points

Watching Nickelodeon:  - 5 cool points

Being Team Edward: + 5 cool points

Admitting we watched (and talking about) the Twilight episode of Oprah: - 50 cool points

What we learned from the Twilight-inspired Oprah episode:


1) KStew is really awkward and shy. Like, more than me. I didn't think there was anyone more awkward than me.

This makes me happy.

Me being less awkward than KStew: + 10 points

2) RPatz giggles. A lot. And when he's not giggling, he's making faces like this
<--------
I've never known a boy to giggle past puberty. Is this an English thing? Or a nervous thing?

Mentioning puberty on my blog: + 5 cool points


3) Even though Jill and I laughed at the cast, the rabid fans, and of course Oprah, we're still extremely pumped for the midnight showing of Eclipse. Which we'll get to experience together for once.

Going to the midnight premier of Eclipse (and possibly watching Twilight and New Moon in a triple feature presentation the same night): - 125 cool points

So what's the tally?

MG's cool factor is currently: - 50


Dang. I guess I better do some extra credit work. 
Any ideas?

Hey! I'm in a Ford commercial!

The hubs and I (and Browdy, of course!) in our first Ford Fiesta online commercial. Enjoy!

Do the Write Thing

Have you guys seen the awesomeness going on over here?
http://dothewritethingfornashville.blogspot.com/

There are some EPIC items up for auction for writers and book lovers. Head on over and bid -- the proceeds go to helping Nashville and its surrounding areas.

My heart, it is broken.

I am devastated.

In case you don't know what this is, it's the Grand Ole Opry, submerged by flood waters. When I saw this photo, my heart just broke for the people of Nashville. All that history... All those homes...

I grew up in Missouri, right on the Missouri River. Flooding is a natural thing for us -- we go through seasonal flooding every few years. The first major flood I can remember was the Great Flood of 1993. My parents took me down the road to see the devastation. We recorded it on our old VHS camcorder. I stood in front and documented the scene like I was a newscaster.

My parents were out of work -- their factory submerged. They didn't know if the owners of the company would pay to rebuild or just shut everything down. After the water receded, the workers went in and gutted the place, trudging through a foot of mud caking the floors and machinery. Thankfully the owners renovated and eventually built a new location. But at the time, a hush of uncertainty filled our household.

Our little summer cottage on the river took on water too, along with that foot of good Missouri mud, but we were able to salvage everything. The walls still show stains here and there.

Every other year the Missouri floods over, just enough to cover a few roads and farmland. Another reason I love living on the bluffs of Missouri's river valley -- you've got a nice barrier when the seasonal floods come along. Something Nashville doesn't have with the Cumberland:


Nashville 2010

2008 brought another major flood to my hometown and the surrounding areas. A creek running through town (usually dry) filled so fast people didn't have time to evacuate. An elderly woman had to be rescued by helicopter from the roof of her trailer.



Needless to say, I feel for the people of Tennessee. I've been there and I know the exhaustive work ahead. Thankfully I've never lost my home or a loved one during a flood, but so many people in Nashville have lost everything.

I'm starting to feel like flooding follows me around, almost like I'm a sort of catalyst for rising waters. I'm not sure what will happen with my plans to visit Nashville this summer for RWA, but this is the second time I've made plans to visit a place only to see it devastated by flood. It's like I'm Jonah and I need to be thrown from the ship.

Okay, maybe not, but still...

A few years back, I planned a trip to take my husband to one of my favorite spots in Missouri -- Johnson's Shut-ins. This is what it usually looks like:



But in 2005, the Taum Sauk Reservoir collapsed, sending 1.5 million gallons of water raging down the hillside and into Johnson's Shut-ins State Park. It was like someone took a razor to the landscape, scraping a thick line of forest away like morning stubble:



The park is almost back to normal now, but it takes a long time to recover from flood damage, especially with all the mud and silt and destruction that's left behind. Who knows when Nashville will be up and running again? Who knows how much history has been lost?

It's been one of my all-time dreams to visit Nashville and the Grand Ole Opry. I hope one day I get the chance to see it renewed to its former glory, but right now I'm grieving for those living through this hell.

Maybe if I still make it to TN this summer, I can help out somehow. Sending a donation is one thing, but actually getting my hands dirty and helping rebuild is another.

Please do what you can and donate to the Disaster Relief Fund. Text REDCROSS to 90999 to donate $10 to support these families in TN.

Monday's Muse -- Weekend Getaway

This weekend we packed our bags -- sans laptop -- and hit the road one last time in our Ford Fiesta. (She goes home this week. *sniff*) We rented a cabin in the woods near Lake Michigan and all the stresses of city-living melted away.

We opened every window and door, letting all the sounds of nature float in through the screens. Red-winged blackbirds called to us, and frogs and crickets sang us to sleep.

We took a dip in the hot tub, watched the sun set over the marsh, grilled steaks, built a fire, curled up in armchairs with notebooks and scribbled ideas and drawings with the evening air stirring our hair.

It was the most peaceful, rejuvenating weekend we've had in a long time. I even got excited about a new idea, one I've been unsure of for a while.

If you feel stagnant, there's nothing like breaking your daily routine to recharge creativity. Grab a blanket and take a nap under the sun. Go for a walk at a nature preserve. Take in new smells and sights and see what happens.

You might be surprised.

Also, I've started FIRE by Kristin Cashore, at the behest of the votes last week. The gnome has spoken!